you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
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