Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
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