If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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