you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Randomize
