There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
