bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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