dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Randomize
