Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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