I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize