idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
