my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
