I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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