You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
