i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Who died my cat blue again?
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