I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
