I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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