just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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