If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
