Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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