She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
