I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
