i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
