I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize