You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
