And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize