it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
