I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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