Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
