If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
