So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Randomize
