So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
