In the future we'll all be gay
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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