Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
