He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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