so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
