Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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