Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
