my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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