Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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