i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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