im drinking this country out of the recession.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
