I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
