i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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