I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
