im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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