hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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