Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
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