Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
