I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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