Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
