Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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